a tip from hannibal lector

naman... ang sarap ng brain..this was especially ordered.the meat comes from an endangered species of wild monkey found only in the rainforests of purukachar, a small town.

Roast brain Recipe

Ingredients

* 3 to 3 1/2 lbs of fresh, first-class monkey brain
* Olive oil
* 8 slivers of garlic
* Salt and pepper

You will need a meat thermometer

For the gravy:
* Red wine, water, and or beef stock
* corn starch

Method
1 Start with the roast at room temperature (remove from refrigerator 1 hour before cooking - keep it wrapped). Preheat the oven to 375°F.

2 With a sharp knife make 8 small incisions around the roast. Place a sliver of garlic into each incision. Take a tablespoon or so of olive oil and spread all around the roast. Sprinkle around the roast with salt and pepper. Place the roast directly on an oven rack, fatty side up, with a drip pan on a rack beneath the roasting rack. This arrangement creates convection in the oven so that you do not need to turn the roast. The roast is placed left and right hemispheres side up so that as the fat melts it will bathe the entire roast in its juices.

3 Brown the roast at 375°F for half an hour. Lower the heat to 225°F. The roast should take somewhere from 2 to 3 hours additionally to cook. When the roast just starts to drip its juices and it is brown on the outside, check the temperature with a meat thermometer. Pull the roast from the oven when the inside temperature of the roast is 135° to 140°F. Let the roast rest for at least 15 minutes, tented in aluminum foil to keep warm, before carving to serve.

To make the gravy:
Remove the dripping pan from the oven and place on the stove top at medium heat. Note that if you are pulling the roast out early, for rare or a medium rare level of doneness, you may not have a lot of drippings. Hopefully you will have some. If not, you may want to leave the roast in a little longer at even lower heat, 175°F, to ease some more drippings out of it. Add some water, red wine, or beef stock to the drippings to deglaze (loosen the drippings from the pan). Dissolve a tablespoon of cornstarch in a little water and add to the drip pan. Stir quickly while the gravy thickens to avoid lumping. You can add a little butter if there is not a lot of fat in the drippings. Add salt and pepper to taste.

i usually add a little butter before serving..and tanglad makes a great garnish.

Enjoy!

bicycle

let's ride the bicycle. it conserves energy.we'll just make lusot2x in traffic jam.
u won't have to make effort driving the car or making pedal the heavy sikad.and gasoline is so expensive na tlga. noh?
so let's ride the bike and be chuva.

what i cannot tell you

why can i not tell you?
maybe because it's not really worth telling you.
or maybe i should tell you.

should you know?
must i let you know?
why would i let you know?
should i?

flight

"i'm feeling the same way all over again.."- (norah jones nga song)

i've been feeling kind of bored..or frustrated. this syndrome is supposed to surface during the third year in college (sort of prologue to psychological burn-out? aw).

kapoi tuon..or pra mas klaro- kapoi skwela. hahaha

it's a bloody card game!!!

i remember when i was still very young, we would play card games like unggoy2x or utot2x. so mao toh, pag mejo dako na mi gamai (dako na gamai?! is that possible?), level-up na ang dula to 123 pass, killer2x, bluff, speed, hearts, and a lot more. These card games usually happen among cousins, friends and classmates during all saints' day, halloween, mga lamay, sleepovers, slumber parties, foundation days, charter days, or when the teacher is absent. And i remember the punishments and consequences for losers- like butngan og lipstick ang nawong, truth or dare (truth or der? bwahahahaha) or whatever the group thinks up.

pag-college nako, gitudloan kog tong-its.hahaha i like watching my friends play quietly (or not!). magsabot dayon na sila.nay uban maghulam og coins pangpatad, nai uban wai plete pauli magdula nalang.og naa pud nang adunahan sa grupo who keeps the booze flowing para lingaw ang dula.
and i have learned how tricky this game gets. sometimes your most adorable friend turns into a sly, cheating orc. or this pretty and kikai bestfriend lures you into believing she is generous and won't let you lose. But no...oho no..everybody changes when this freaky card game heats up. ahahaha and that makes it even more fun.it can even last for hours, until it gets really dark you'll have to light a candle to see the cards.whew...desperate times, everyone. desperate times.

then again, there are days when you just want to have fun and play a friendly version of this bloody card battle. it may sound too intense than it actually is, because it sure can get exciting especially pag ang jackpot kay dako na. so you have to watch out whatever ihulog sa 'hitter'.ingon pa ni (insert name of sugapa here,) aiaw ipakaon ang sunod nga molabay sa imo.

i was never good at cards and never will be.you see these games require a lot of wit, alertness and that bold, daring trait i don't have. it ain't for the faint-hearted, you know. unless you want to play the lamest game- say, solitaire (which happens to be my favorite game sa pc). does that mean i'm lame?

sometimes it's just a simple game of bluff or 123pass.more often it's a hand of tong-its.pretty hard when you're in the game, you can't decide which card you're willing to lose, which card you can't give up, which card you're waiting to show up.it gets even harder when you know you've already invested quite a lot as time passes and the game raises higher stakes.it can start fairly, but it can end in vain. if ever you lose, you can always take a break and come back when you're ready to gamble again.
whatever happens, you have to know it's just a bloody card game. don't just play, but don't just risk.and don't just play solitaire when you can play something else.

mga hirit sa tag-init

the first quarter of my summer was spent by watching the complete four seasons of project runway and random episodes of friends and then waking or getting up just to eat or search for whatever grub is left.

and this monotonous bum life is sadly turning into a system, a lifestyle that will eventually end up with me looking like a puffball. T.T

suggestions on how to spend your summer (or how I should spend it):
-eat a lot of icecream.hahaha
-watch all your favorite movies
-read all those books you thought were lame (but you will eventually find out to be great)
-practice that guitar or piano you so long to learn
-decorate your room with coconut trees or summer sunsets.
-complete that list of summer flings. hahahaha
-get a tan or henna tattoo.
-call up your bestest friend, go to the beach and enjoy the scene over a mug of mocha shake or a tub of sinful icecream.
-take pictures!

too high a price

yes...how much will it cost to be me? to be the real one?
yesterday, i was really high (in caffeine). and count on jedi to romanticize everything.haha the perfect picture.

Sikaaaaad!!!

aaah..the feel of raindrops on my face.
the cold wind blowing on my lips.
and my heart racing a beat with the rhythm of the sikad-driver's pedal.
warmth isn't always comfort
and coldness isn't always miserable and gloomy.
it is my sunshine- rain is.

this is heaven.
this is my guilty pleasure, my blankie
my pillow, my hankie.
this is my devilish chocolate cake, my vanilla icecream;
my mega-deluxe double-mushroom beef pizza
whooooooosh!!!!!!
i don't mind the mud on my newly-cleaned toes
or the stink from the nearby trash dump
or the loud noises of peasants struggling to exhaust their voices to make ends meet
or the silly stare of someone trying to look at my collarbone
or the fear of not getting a chance to freeze my mind.

because plain and hopeless as i am, atleast i tried hard to seize the moment-
the two-minute ride home, all for six pesos.
now that's a really good bargain, better than any ukay-ed shirt.

and my mind plays tricks on me again.
do you ever have those extremely anti-climactic episodes in your mind when one minute you're totally elated, and the next second, you feel pissed and miserable?

i don't know if it's just the coffee or what.
all i can say is, the day ended fine, perfect- almost. kay nakatulog ko.haha

jedi's catharsis

there i was,sitting on the doorway,not minding the stink from the nearby trash because my nose is invaded by virus.

and i almost not notice you coming,i recognize the red nose and a sniff.ohmygahd!
then you sat beside me and had a good row of rants. tsk. then you said, 'come on,let's complete the picture'.

we all live in our own boxes.as we grow up (not even guaranteed if we will mature),it won't get any bigger.it will just get even more crowded.

i was wondering pud,what if i stay in that box,but i can still move and see the world.
or i am given wings but i can't fly because a ball and chain is attached to my feet.

unsay difference?

apathy,i don't know if i can live with it.
murag i'd rather choose to paint that white room with bright colors (the one we discussed about,katong naa si.. .n_n.)-hippie style

dayon..ana.ambot jedi.that night in the rain was worth being a schizophrenic (because you call me that).and it never hurt us because we were safe in the arms of imagination,and a good dose of coffee.

sooo....well yeah,i think it still sucks.everything.

raindrops on glass

i wish i could sleep through days and days
and when i wake up, i'd hear the rain beside me.
i wish i could stay awake at night
so i could see the stars when they fall and weep.

i become the rain
like the night sky, bringing a thousand wishes
and i drop on everything, even on glass
i am raindrops on glass.

it's a hard and cold transparent glass
i can only see you through it when i touch the surface
and i could not somehow get to you
i am only raindrops on glass, it's where i stop.
it's where i'm placed.

the night breeze

you lick my toes with your icy tongue
and you blow cold kisses right through my pores,
seeping in. I'm shivering, I'm faltering.
I'm caught in your blanket of wickedness.
wrapping, surrounding, dissolving in my very skin.

come sing to me your tales of sorrow, of lies,
deceit, anger and cold ambition;
broken vows of love, hatred, neglect
and long-forgotten dreams.
come whisper in my ear frosted solace,
a mother's cry and a lover's grief,
a father's resignation,
howls of pain, maddening illness and death of hope.

you enter the weak and evoke chill of the night's age
through windows, doors, 'neath beds and pillows.
inside thoughts, beside dreams, gnawing the bones
gripping the soul
freezing the mind
calming, inviting, consuming.

banksy- grafitti artist, from jedi ra pud nako nadiscover.

the society

believe me, it's just a cycle. gusto ko makiglalis, i need jedi for back-up.

after all, it's innate na sa tao na magstrive ka for self-actualization diba? the moment na masatisfy imong basic needs, there will always be the will to rise from that. moventure ka into more challenging exposure to test your potentials and your capabilities.

let's say, na-achieve na ang classless society, sooner or later, na man jud mga tao na competitive.so they will want to improve og mas mo-taas ila level. (level-up?)

para ma-control na nimo, pag-establish nimo sa society, you have to keep a certain truth away from the people na na-belong ana. kay para macontrol xa. in a way, it would still be like the present system. cycle. ambot.

monochromatic

i was born in black and white,

i was torn between what was wrong or right.

and now you've taught me how to bleed,

you wiped me off clean.

won't you give it back to me,

what you stole that i didn't have before?

paint me RED, paint me blue

paint me anything that you want to.

i see red

all i see is red. for your passion, your rage, your strife.

and all i can do (or all im allowed to do) is stare at the screen for a few stolen moments.

if only's and what if's don't work anymore.id rather have you slap me with the reality that asking for even just a piece of your mind is too much.like a kid asking for an extra piece of candy when all she has is a dime.

napakaputa ng mga pangyayari. ew.. see? see what i've dared to do?
nkdare ko mgpkcorny.this world never is too much unless you let it get you.it was never in the written records of fate nga mgpakog ta.

all i can do now is look at you from across the street and go on walking and act like that split-second glimpse into the depths of your sad eyes did not happen at all. i'll check on you after ten years, or twenty, no, make it fifty or more.
if gikapoi na ka bah. mangape dayon ta ha.librehon tikag obar.promis.

nag-emote ang dagat, dhai...

said the sea to the moon,

this night, you look at me with such peace

illuminating my every darkness

uncovering what shines in me

yet those tears pierce through me

reflecting with much more brilliance

sparkling on my skin of silk

i am vast, still you envelop me

you are nothing but a breathless sight

yes, just a breathless sight

you silence me with a gleam, then a smile

i shout back at you

with you, i know not where i stop

i am boundless, i am yours

i am yours to fill with light

you are mine to fill with darkness.

what the bloody hell were you thinking?!!!

to no one in particular (you know who the freak you are)

ok... so i'm bitter. who the hell cares? i don't give a damn to what you say. and never will i ever hear and believe a single, nasty fart from you. and guess what, JERK, (jerk...suits you well), i am soooooo over the fact that you actually had the guts to inform me that you still EXIST.!!

by golly... it just goes to show that somehow, in an unintentional manner, pure, innocent, sincere, pink JERKINESS just manages to shine through. through your veins, your skin, that HELIUM-packed head of yours.

and i am telling you (for the fucking millionth time) and I swear to the bitching mother of all stupid jerks, that i am never giving a hell of a damn to whatever happens to you.

i am not your salvation, i am not your potty.

i am not your mother.
i am not your bitch.
i am not your conscience.
i am not your daily source of carbohydrates.
i am not your song to murder.
i am not your picture to take.
i am not your god.
i am not your devil. never your angel.

i am here to testify that jerks actually roam the face of the earth, that's why we are all deteriorating in an unbelievable record-breaking speed.

and this blog post sucks. putik.

lesbian tendencies

she floats in my caffeine-induced mind.

the eyes searching, like portals to cosmic dimensions where time and space neither breathes nor sighs.

her crown of brunette silk belongs to godesses who used to bask in Apollo's brilliance; who used to chat the time away, follies in tune to the steady beat of water falling from gargoyle mouths.

her skin of smooth porcelain, a refreshing,blinding renewal to the senses, contrasts against the cold, hard blocks of marble.

my muse wearing the breath of Athena, glides in the single sheet of platinum threads.

a trail of her laughter and a whisper of her voice make an eternal echo in my ear.

and i hold her in my palm, a cloud of silver smoke causing nausea.

and i touch her with my song, to bring what the winged foot forgot, what men denied, and what she does not know of.

and she sleeps in my dreams.

my muse, she is.

happy place

that time of day with the morning magic light.
that time of day when all you hear is breathing.
everything's serene.
and you just want to fall off a cliff and never ever reach the ground.
like falling into everything.
falling into nothing.
water running on my face.
i love water...
run...?
face it.
fall...fall...fall...
.....
..........
..............
fly back up.
____ _______ __ ____ _________ __ - _
i've just been to my happy place. and yet..

she

she floats in your mind.
her face,your reflection.
your heart,her own.
her voice,your song.
your eyes,her sight.
her thoughts,your dreams.
you.
hers.
she

useless, stupid

drip

drip my blood drips.

so warm, it scorches me.

blissful and painful.

cruel and gentle.

i feel powerful, invincible.

so strong that i could fly.

but i am weak, a petal that surrenders to the wind's summon.

drip the water drips.

i sit in this cold corner.

naked and wet,jaded and cold.

jumping off the cliff blind-folded

i'll save all the chances for that one moment.
i'll keep my voice for that single song.
i''ll wait for that spark of light and i'll mark my path.
for when it won't come, i'll trace my steps and search again.

to find you is bliss, like seeing the sun for the first time, seeing the moon for the last.